The 6th Birthday Letter

I've written my son a letter every year on his birthday. This year I'm posting it on my blog. One day he will get to read them. Perhaps when he's older, when he becomes a father, or maybe when I've died. I hope he knows these 3 things remain constant throughout the years that have passed and those to come: I love him, I'm proud of him, and he will always be my baby.

Dear Buddy Boy:

Today you turned 6. The morning did not start off too well. You were 20 minutes late to school. We had 2 time outs before we left the house. Boy were you cranky. We rushed down the block in sweatpants and a polo shirt because your dress pants weren't clean. Mommy's fault. I crossed my fingers and hoped the rest of the day went better for you.

It did! At the end of the day you rushed out of those doors right to me, grinning, giggling, wearing this ridiculous birthday crown and birthday stickers. The utter joy that is you all bundled into that smile and exploded out of the glint in your eyes. Oh the love I feel for you! There aren't words to express or fully explain. It is just love, simply put. Huge and encompassing all that I am and all I ever want to be.

I became a mother 6 years ago today. It was a role that I had always feared and yet desperately wanted. For close to 9 months I was poked and prodded in places better left unnamed. My a$$ was purple throughout most of the time you were summersaulting in my uterus. That week in the hospital I would unwrap you and just look at your toes, your fingers, your eyes. Just you and me, and you were utterly my son.

By the way, I forgive you for calling me stupid and world's worst mami this morning. You're just like your daddy, making me laugh even when I'm mad at you. Te quiero baby.

Love,
Mami