I’m very proud of my boy. No matter how many goals we put
before him, he always tries. Sometimes I hate autism. I hate the bleeping
sensory challenges. My little boy doesn’t get to be just a kid all that often.
In school he has to learn to cope and adapt. Other kids, non spectrum kids,
they can transition fine 10-20 times during the school day. My boy—he’s
struggling, he’s trying, he’s coping. He’s asking for squeezes, he’s asking for
moments, he’s trying and he doesn’t understand why he can’t control his body.
His teacher is unaware of all the success we’ve had, all the therapies, all the
interventions, how far we’ve come to get us here. She is new to autism and my
boy is her introduction to all that comes with it, she’s lost too. She doesn’t
know how to help.
I’m the mom, the driver, the therapist, the hugger, the one
who has cried countless times in the shower after the kids have gone to bed. I’m
the one who sat on the floor crying along with my boy as he was in full
meltdown mode. I’m the one who second guesses everything, who wants to
homeschool so he never ever feels different or bad, who never cries for me. I’m
the one who is struggling right now too.
Oh F you autism and the horse you rode up in. My kiddo may
be diagnosed with autism, but it doesn’t make up all of who he is. He’s a
little boy and the hell if I’m going to let you take away his right to an inclusive
education.
And anyone, and yes dear Pre-K teacher this is for you, if anyone
stands in his way to this education—you don’t know me. Because I may be
struggling, but I know my rights, I know HIS rights, and damned if I’ll ever
stop advocating for him.
So feel free dear teacher to assign blame to my child
for a scratch and bruise on another classmates arm. Feel free to send home an
incident report blaming my child even WHEN YOU DIDN’T FLIPPING SEE MY KID DO
IT.
I will call and schedule an emergency IEP meeting and yes even haul the
church priest in there with us if I have to (Catholic school). Nice to meet you too sweetie. BTW
I spoke to the school principal today and you should be prepared to have a
meeting with her about this. See you tomorrow. I guess you know me now huh? My boy is more than the convenient person to blame. He is a 4 year old boy who wants to learn and play and I'm the mom that's going to make it happen.
