Is this what it's like?

My lovely girls turned 17 months old. I can't believe my babies are so big, they look like toddlers now. Where did my babies go? Boy are they acting like soon to be 2 year olds! Oh the drama, oh the tears, oh my where's my Motrin! How do triplet or higher number multi parents survive the terrible twos?  Goodness, JD's 2nd year was in a word-- traumatizing. Of course in hindsight I realize that his "temper tantrums" really were meltdowns and that some of them weren't caused by anger but frustration. In a way, his diagnosis has helped me to understand JD's viewpoint. Perhaps comparing their 2nd yr to his isn't exactly fair. At least, that's what I keep telling myself in my pep talk!

We had Apple's multi discipline evaluation last week. She's behind in motor skills and speech. She'll start her speech therapy in September. Her private occupational therapy (not from early intervention) has been increased to twice weekly. She seems to have plateaued in her walking, kind of shuffles, very unsteady, and slow. She's very quick to resort to crawling. I'm still worried sick over what could be causing the hypotonia. I worry, google is pretty scary when you research torticollis, hypotonia, speech delay. I've stopped doing that for now but do have to ask our pediatrician about some genetic blood testing while I wait for the developmental pediatrician's appointment at CHOP.

 

Apple is struggling to walk, not talking, gagging with lots of foods. While Cems, although tiny, is talking and running. Hubby and I ask each other, "Do you think this is what normal is like?" 

Let's be honest-- We haven't known "normal" or "neuro-typical" development. Until Cems we didn't know what the hell normal looks like because quite frankly we haven't had normal. With JD we knew he should have been speaking more and now with the diagnosis we definitely see that he did not develop or hit milestones at a "normal" schedule. And honestly, if we'd known about JD's ASD before I got pregnant with the girls, we would never know what "normal" feels or looks like. So to us, it feels odd, wonderful, and scary to see Cems developing on and even ahead of schedule. Because at last weeks MDE- I also did the DAYC on Cems, she's way ahead in Speech. Wonderful, awesome, and yes very scary. One day at a time and hope for the best, it's out of our hands anyway right? What more can we do? Just keep plugging along and hope to God we're doing it right.

Why scary? Because how do you know if this is normal? It's not like disorders or illnesses announce themselves. Am I being pessimistic? No, just realistic. And to a certain extent, I've been programmed to wait for the "things go to crap" moment. Life has not been perfect up until now. I am also watching Cems running and talking like a little parrot. It's tiring and oh so indescribable to be a parent of 3 and watch them all play, smile, and giggle as they tumble and pillow fight in JD's bed right before bath time. I'm so thankful to God for allowing me to be a Mother. As hard as being a stay at home mom is, it's worth it.